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Showing posts from November, 2005

Finally got my Thanksgiving :)

One of our friends that works with B gifted us with a good chunk of fried turkey so I cooked up a Thanksgiving feast last nite for dinner. Ahhhhh, *now* I feel like I had a holiday. Thanks Tanya! :)

An interesting spin on Christianity

Cyndi was kind enough to share this article from this month's Harper's magazine with me and it's a terrific read! It's 9 pages so make sure you have a block of time to read it. Hope you guys enjoy! :)

Lighting a candle

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I am joining Andy in lighting this candle against the darkness of ignorance. I encourage everyone reading this blog to write a letter or make a call on this issue. Hopefully we can make a difference!

Entertainment News: The weekend update

Here's how our Thanksgiving weekend shaped up this year...

Thursday we were originally invited to my sis's house in the country but then my brother-in-law remembered that he was mad at me and uninvited us. Ah well, didn't wanna have to put up with his scary hillbilly redneck ass anyway. B slept in til 2pm and I farted around on the computer all day. Our meal ended up being breakfast food at about 4ish and then we escaped to the club that evening. It was a relaxing day but didn't feel at all like Thanksgiving which is kinda sad to me. :-(

Friday B had to work, so I arranged to work as well. My therapist has generously agreed to trade services with me during my period of no insurance, so I did office work for her all day Friday. It's quite the project she's got going there so we're talking about getting me some money to help her finish it. Hope this doesn't mess up my unemployment pittance! :)

Friday night Cyndi and Jules came over to spend the weekend with …

Countdown

I ganked this from a completely unrelated blog that I've never visited before but I liked it enough to do it. Y'all feel free to gank it...enjoy!

10 movies you'd watch over and over:

1. Heavy Metal (yes, I'm talking about the animated one)
2. Rocky Horror Picture Show (and I talk to the movie too!)
3. Velvet Goldmine (because bois in makeup are just a good thing)
4. Priscilla Queen of the Desert (anyone noticing a fag hag theme going here?)
5. Labyrinth (mmmm David Bowie in tights)
6. Princess Bride (been crushing on Carey Elwes for too long)
7. Spinal Tap (truly a cult classic)
8. The Hunger (David Bowie and Catherine Deneuve as vampires, can you say Jenni sammich?)
9. Wizard of Oz (really this one should have been higher on the list...)
10. How the Grinch Stole Christmas (the original animated one with Boris Karloff narrating, yay!)

9 people you enjoy the company of (aside from family):

1. Barry (I loves my pretty blonde boi!)
2. Jules (My favorite crunchy granola pagan lesbitaria…

This about sums it up

Here's an excellent joke about the Bush administration...unfortunately it's all too true. Thanks to Cyndi for this! :)

How many members of the Bush administration does it take to change a light bulb?

Ten.

1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed;

2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed;

3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb;

4. One to tell the nations of the world that they are either for changing the light bulb or for eternal darkness;

5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the new light bulb;

6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a step ladder under the banner 'Bulb Accomplished';

7. One administration insider to resign and in detail reveal how Bush was literally 'in the dark' the whole time;

8. One to viciously smear No. 7;

9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light-bulb-changing poli…

Happy Thanksgiving!

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Here's a little humor for everyone today. I hope that each and every one of you has a fabulous day!

Cup O Elvis?

Okay so my Shelly was competely out of control today, but this link was too good not to share...

http://www.elviscoffee.com/

Walk The Line

I liked the movie but don't just take my word for it. Check out what his former manager had to say about it...

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/10145077/

Thanks to my Shelly for this who apparently had way too much time on her hands at work today. :)

Cool Optical Illusion

My Shelly was killing time at work today and sent me this link. It's kinda freaky how the brain works...

http://www.patmedia.net/marklevinson/cool/cool_illusion.html

Alabama Blonde

My sister sent this one to me and I couldn't help but share. Hope y'all enjoy! :)

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Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table. A very attractive blonde woman from Alabama arrives and bets twenty-thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice. She says, "I hope y'all don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I'm completely nude."

With that, she strips from the neck down, rolls the dice and yells, "Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!"

As the dice come to a stop she jumps up and down and squeals, "I WON, I WON!"

She hugs each of the dealers and then picks up her winnings and her clothes and quickly departs. The dealers stare at each other dumfounded. Finally, one of them asks, "What did she roll?" The other answers, "I don't know, I thought you were watching."

Moral:

Not all people from Alabama are stupid and not all blondes are dumb, but all men are men.

Twas the Night Before Thanksgiving

Twas the night before Thanksgiving and all through the kitchen;
I was cooking and baking and moanin' and bitchin'.
I've been here for hours, I can't stop to rest;
this room's a disaster, just look at this mess!
Tomorrow I've got thirty people to feed.
They expect all the trimmings. Who cares what I need!
My feet are both blistered; I've got cramps in my legs.
The cat just knocked over a bowl full of eggs.
There's a knock at the door and the telephone's ringing;
frosting drips on the counter as the microwave's dinging.
Two pies in the oven, dessert's almost done;
my cookbook is soiled with butter and crumbs.
I've had all I can stand, I can't take anymore;
Then in walks my husband, spilling rum on the floor.
He weaves and he wobbles, his balance unsteady;
then grins as he chuckles "The eggnog is ready!"
He looks all around and with total regret,
says "What's taking so long....aren't you through in here yet??"
As quick as a fl…

Entertainment News: My busy weekend :)

This weekend flew by and is like a blur when I try to recreate it in my head. Let's see if I can remember it all...

Friday was my sister and my nephew's birthday (she had him on her 30th so it's really easy for me to remember how old he is, LOL!). Their family dog got hit and killed about a month ago and they've all been feeling the loss. Deb especially when she's had to go to the barn by herself...she'd prefer to at least have an animal with her to protect her from wild critters who may have wandered into the shelter of the barn. She decided that for her birthday she wanted to get a new family dog. Deb discovered Craig's List and got her geek on all day Friday checking out possible dogs to adopt. She finally landed on a 3.5 year old golden retreiver named Cinnamon who was free to a good home but lived east of Plano. This is the part where I came in because I love my sissy but the poor thing gets lost every single time she comes to Dallas. (I can't reall…

Which Soldier Type Are You?

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Got this one via The Cap'n and Kurt. Heh, I'm sure these results come as no surprise to anyone including me. LOL!

You scored as Civilian. You're a civilian. Not a soldier, period. You don't enjoy fighting. And more or less think all the people who do are retards who need to use thier brains more than their brawn. Beware the day will come when even peace lovers and buddhist monks will pick up shotguns in defence.

PEACE OUT!!!

Civilian88%Officer69%Medic63%Special Ops56%Combat Infantry50%Artillery44%Support Gunner38%Engineer31%
Which soldier type are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

Which Peanuts Character Are You?

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Ganked this post from Kurt, I love this comic strip! Honestly I thought I was going to end up being Lucy so this came as a surprise to me... :)


You are Snoopy!


Which Peanuts Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

One more Veteran's Day thought...

My friend Brian sent this to me and I just had to share it with you guys. I know I'm a little late but this is most definitely worth sharing. Read the story and then watch the video, it's worth the two minutes!

http://www.terry-kelly.com/introduction.htm

Happy Veteran's Day!

Just wanted to give a shout out to all the men and women who selflessly go into dangerous places and fight without question. I sure do wish we had some better orders for our current troops because I'd love to see all of them come home. Thanks to everyone who has given their youth to serve our country, I admire you in ways that you cannot imagine. :)

Marriage humor

Thought I'd better post a little humor to lighten things up around here. Got this from a girl at work and it's hillarious! :)

Marriage (Part I)

Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules:

"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want-and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules.

Any comments?"

His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not."

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Marriage (Part II)

Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary!

$20.00

My Shelly sent this to me today and I *really* needed to hear it. :)


A well-known speaker started off his seminar by holding up a $20.00 bill. In the room of 200, he asked, "Who would like this $20 bill?"

Hands started going up.

He said, "I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this."

He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill.

He then asked, "Who still wants it?"

Still the hands were up in the air.

Well, he replied, "What if I do this?"

And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty.

"Now, who still wants it?"

Still the hands went into the air.

"My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value."

It was still worth $20.

Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circ…

How did we survive?

I've started reading a newly discovered blog recently and thought I'd post this little gem that my Shelly sent me a while back. This one's for you, Guy, I think you'll appreciate it!

If you lived as a child in the 50's, 60's or 70's how did you survive?

Looking back, it's hard to believe that we have lived as long as we have...

As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat.

Our baby cribs were covered with bright colored lead-based paint. We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors, or cabinets, and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets.

(Not to mention hitchhiking to town as a young kid!)

We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle. Horrors.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then rode down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times we learned to solve the proble…

A little baby humor :)

My Shelly sent me this link today and knew that I would appreciate it since I'm an avid non-breeder. Be forewarned, if you're the type of person that loves each and every baby on the planet just because they're there, do NOT follow this link. I personally think it's pretty hillarious...

http://www.babyreview.com/

Entertainment news: The anniversary celebration

We had a truly fantastic weekend celebrating our anniversary! Three whole days of playing, woohoo!

Thursday night B started the celebration by heading to the club with Jules to blow off steam from the week. I ended up staying home that night since my back was still in 12 million little knots from being out earlier in the week. :-(

Friday morning B slept in while I went and signed on with yet another placement agency to try and get myself some more permanent work. In the afternoon/evening we had ourselves a spa day including massages, manicures and pedicures. Ahhhhh, a massage is exactly what my back needed to be psuedo functional again! :) We treated ourselves to an eating adventure that night and went to a fondue restaurant in Addison. I ate so much I literally thought I was going to pop but the food was awesome and the dining itself was so fun!

Saturday I got up early to wait for the satellite guy to come hook up the existing dish on the roof of our building. He had the inevitable dela…

A real post...*gasp*

Since it's officially been long enough since I posted an actual update that I only have jokes and emails in my "last 10" list, I guess I'm overdue. Sorry folks, I'm not trying to hold out here.

This was week two at my contract job and I must say that I'm terminally bored with the project already. I'm working in the foreclosure department of a large lender but I'm working with all the Katrina-affected accounts. This team has been formed to try to find the people who have not called in since the storm, to do the 4-month payment deferrment on the accounts that need the time to regroup, and to write off the accounts that were destroyed by flooding and didn't have flood insurance. In theory that all sounds very noble and maybe if I was being allowed to do something besides skip tracing every day then I wouldn't be over it so quickly. The scary part is that there's potentially phone work involved with this assignment and it's going to be hear…

I needed to hear this today

With all the stress in my life right now, country Shelli sent me the perfect thing to think about. I had to share it here:

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love. So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

Thanksgiving greetings

Country Shelli sent this to me and ohmigawd, it's too funny! Hope y'all enjoy!

Disco Turkey

Inner peace

My stepmom shared this with me and I'm thinking it's some pretty good advice. :)

By following the simple advice I heard on a Dr. Phil Show, I have finally found inner peace. Dr. Phil proclaimed the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started.

So I looked around my house to see things I started and hadn't finished; and, before leaving the house this morning I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a bottle of Baileys, a bottle of Kahlua, a package of Oreo's, a pot of coffee, the rest of the Cheesecake, some Saltines and a box of Godiva Chocolates.

Political lessons

Here's a gem from Billy that I *had* to share!

DEMOCRATIC You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
You feel guilty for being successful.
Barbra Streisand sings for you.

REPUBLICAN You have two cows.
Your neighbor has none.
So?

SOCIALIST You have two cows.
The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

COMMUNIST You have two cows.
The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
You wait in line for hours to get it.
It is expensive and sour.

CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE You have two cows.
You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE You have two cows.
Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then pours the milk down the drain.

AMERICAN CORPORATION You have two cows.
You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announce…

Maybe I'm wrong but I think this is hillarious!

My Shelly sent me this and I couldn't help passing it on to you guys. You gotta love this woman's timing...

http://www.breitbart.com/news/2005/10/27/D8DGIS500.html

Getting to know me

I got another one of these questionnaires in my inbox today but since it's from a very old friend that I rarely hear from, I thought I'd go ahead and do it. This one's for you, Sheridan! :)

1. What is your occupation? The dreaded mortgage industry
2. What color is your underwear? Turquoise snake skin
3. What are you listening to right now? CSI in the background
4. What is the last thing you ate? string cheese at my desk this afternoon
5. Do you wish on stars? Sometimes
6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Periwinkle :)
7. What is the weather like right now? Chilly, it's cuddling weather!
8. Last person you spoke to on the phone? My Punkin aka Barry
9. Do you like the person who sent this to you? Yeppers, very much.
10. How old were you on your last birthday? 36
11. Favorite drink? Cherry vodka sour
12. Favorite sport to watch? Not a big sports fan but I do like watching the oddball ones like horseback riding and pool tournaments and I'm trying to get into hockey.
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