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Showing posts from August, 2006

Which Muppet am I?

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Happily stolen from Glen and Thia's myspace bulletins. :)

You Are Miss Piggy
A total princess and diva, you're totally in charge - even if people don't know it.
You want to be loved, adored, and worshiped. And you won't settle for anything less.
You're going to be a total star, and you won't let any of the "little people" get in your way.
Just remember, piggy, never eat more than you can lift!The Muppet Personality Test

I Think I'll Have a Nervous Breakdown Now...

My first contract fell through yesterday because the seller wasn't willing to make enough repairs for the property to qualify for my buyer's financing. The good news is that they're already pre-approved and now we just need to find the right house.

My car is in the shop as of last night and the mechanic doesn't yet know what's wrong with it. I haven't had a car all day today and might not again tomorrow. Plus, who knows how much this is going to cost us? Thankfully we have another car and I can take B to work and pick him up so I'll at least be mobile tomorrow.

I'm in the process of gathering every penny together that I can so that we can continue to live until I either get a paycheck coming or have to go find a day job.

Is this the part where I'm allowed to freak out?

You Might Be a Pagan If...

LOL! This one's happily stolen from Da Jules' myspace blog. :)

You Might be Pagan If...

When you're sworn in in court, you bring your own grimoire.

You've been seen talking to cats. They talk back. You understand what they're saying.

When asked if you believe in God, you ask, "Which one?"

You know what "widdershins" means.

You have an entire spice cabinet and you don't cook.

You know that laurel and bay leaves are the same thing.

You have a frequent buyer card at the local antique bookstore.

The proprietor of said bookstore picks out anything to do with the Celts and saves it for you.

You think Mercedes Lackey should be a cultural icon.

You know that there are exceptions to the laws of physics. You've caused them.

The first thing your guests say is, "My, that's a nice... altar... you have there."

On Halloween, you yell "Happy New Year!" at passers-by.

You know that Christmas trees were originally pagan symbols. That's why…

A Little Real Estate Humor!

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My title company friend sent this to me yesterday and it made me laugh cuz it's SO true! I had to share...

Your House As Seen By

Yourself:



Your Lender:



Your Buyer:



Your Appraiser:



Your Taxing Authority:

Wow, Yesterday Sucked :-(

Yesterday was such a bizarrely bad day, I wonder if it had anything to do with the anniversary of Katrina? Hopefully today will be better...I'm crossing my fingers and saying a prayer anyway!

Vote for Texas!

Reposting this from Brian's blog, y'all go do it!

To Texans, Converted Texans, Former Texans, and everyone who wishes they were Texan:

Calling All Texans! Vote, Don't Mess with Texas!

Friends: We need your help. Don't Mess with Texas has been nominated as one of the best slogans of all time. This is for the Madison Avenue Advertising Walk of Fame. The slogan is nominated right alongside Nike's "Just Do It" and Wheaties' "The Breakfast of Champions." Winners are selected American Idol style with online voting. Basically, our goal is to get as many Texans to vote as possible. And with 22 million real Texans, how can we lose?

Here's how you can help:

1. Most important, go to http://www.votedmwt.com and vote for Don't Mess with Texas. One vote per computer, so you can vote at work and at home.
2. Copy this post and email it to your friends, family and coworkers and ask them to vote for "Don't Mess with Texas." Send it to anyone w…

Real Estate Update :)

Just to let everyone know what's going on, we had our first inspection on the property and are now negotiating seller repairs. I expect this deal will close but we've got some pretty serious negotiations to tackle in the meantime. The seller has our initial request and we're waiting to hear back on it...

In other news, I'm putting in another offer for a different client on Wednesday. Not sure it's going to fly because the sellers have the property *ridiculously* over-priced. Our offer is fair though so we'll see what happens with it. Crossing my fingers that I get another contract before the end of the month! Woot!

Thought I'd give you guys the update. Thanks again to everyone for believing in me and being my emotional support through this time! Love you guys!

This Will Be Me When I'm Elderly...

Got this one from my Mom-person and it made me giggle. Hope you guys enjoy! :)

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking pro…

Ohmgiawd, I Can't WAIT Til October!

Finally, the Morning After Pill is Approved!

Not that it affects me necessarily but I just can't tell you guys how glad I am that in this current government a good thing happened. Check it out:

FDA OKs "morning-after" pill without a prescription

Check out my living room! :)

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Here's the story...B was sicker than a dog yesterday and had to call into work. Today his boss covered his shift even though B was feeling better so he unexpectedly got a day off. Today was my turn to feel like complete hammered dog shit but the boi was motivated. We recently got this incredible piece of furniture that a friend made for us but we hadn't rearranged the living room to incorporate it. B took on the project today and now my living room makes me SOOOOOOOOO happy! Check it out:







Everyone please note the Elvis in every corner, LOL!

A Special Thanks. :)

I just wanted to send out a special thanks to everyone who has believed in me during all this even when I couldn't or wouldn't believe in myself. I really and truly love you guys!!!

The Seal is Broken!!!

I have my very first fully-executed contract! As long as the property passes inspection, we'll be closing at the beginning of October. I can't tell you guys how relieved I am to know that a paycheck is indeed coming...I can't figure out whether to cry or laugh so I'm just doing both and probably look like a complete maniac but I don't care. Hopefully now the stress-level in my body can go way down and I can keep doing what I seem to be very good at which is real estate. I have a career, WOOT!

Now who's coming out tonite to celebrate with me? Hope I see at least some of y'all at the Crotch!

Finally a Craft Site for People Like Me!

The Cap'n found this site and emailed it to me. Finally fellow crafters that think like me!

The Anti-Craft

Where in the World is Jen??

Yes, children, I do realize how long it's been since I did an update post and I'm sorry about being flaky on it. I've been crazy busy and monster stressed out so I haven't wanted to share. :-(

The first Tuesday in August I did the final birthday event by meeting my biological father's wife, Miss Thang for a meal and to purchase my new desk chair. I ended up getting totally hooked up with a new chair *and* a shiatsu back massager. The massager is made by Homedics and I gotta tell you guys that it's the absolute bomb (POW!)! Everyone should have one of these...

The first Saturday in August we celebrated my buddy Brian's graduation from college. I'm SO proud of him for finishing!!! We met a new band at the small gathering and I want to go see them play sometime soon. Check them out: Ya Ya Band.

There's been a little hiccup in our new Friday night club outing at Club One that we've been digging on for the last few months. It got cancelled the first wee…

Mary Kay Quote

Here's a quote from the cosmetics queen sent to me by my Mom-person. I liked it and thought I'd share:

"Women need confidence, and I want you to have it. Remember that confidence is built by one small success after the other. Many of us destroy our self-confidence by dwelling on past failures and forgetting our little successes."

Things are looking up for me, kids. I'll do an update as soon as I have the time. Hope everyone is having a great weekend!

New Recipe

Hey everyone! I finally got around to posting my etouffee recipe on my recipe site. Y'all feel free to check it out:

Jen's Recipes

What's My Inner Faerie?

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Happily stolen from Bobbie's myspace bulletin, and strangely accurate I might add. :)







What's your inner Faerie?




You are a faerie of the flame. You tend to lose your temper at the littlest thing, hot-headed. You're a loyal friend to those who can understand your raging moods. You're social though claim not to be. You are no one else but yourself and sometimes you try to hard to be just that. You're a passionate friend, and would do almost anything for those you care for.
Take this quiz!








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A Fresh Meme :)

Ganked this one from Kurt, too fun not to share!

Do you sleep with your closet door open or closed?
Closed, doesn't everyone know about the closet monster??

Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotels?
Nah I wouldn't wanna use that crappy product.

Have you ever stolen a street sign before?
Hasn't everyone?

Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of bees?
I'm going with the bear, it seems like it would be a faster death.

What is your biggest pet peeve?
Injustice, it just makes me go thru the roof!

Do you ever dance if there's no music playing?
Yes, I dance to the music in my head often. :)

What's your favorite scary movie?
I can't narrow it down to just one.

Where would you bury hidden treasure?
The only place I'd bury hidden treasure is on my own land, but I'd rather have it earning interest somewhere.

What is your "song of the week"?
Bossy - Kelis

Is it OK for guys to wear pink?
Sure, why not?

What movies could you watch over an…

Google Search to Make You Laugh!

Go to Google and search for the word "failure". Look at the first thing that comes up. LOL! Happy Friday everyone!

Say Thanks to the Troops!

Reposting Kelly's myspace bulletin on this...I did it and you should too!

Go to the web site: www.letssaythanks.com

You can pick out a thank you card . Xerox will print it and send to a soldier that is currently serving in Iraq. You can't pick out who gets it, but it will go to some member of the armed services. It is FREE and it only takes a second. Wouldn't it be great if the soldiers received a bunch of these? I sent mine, now you send one too!

A Love Poem...

Had to steal this from The Cap'n, LOL!

Once More, My Love

This night I shall dream of your great kumquat fluffy black-eyed susan.
Once again, this night as all nights, I long to sip from your ukelele-pink lips.
In my dreams we fly on the exquisite swamp rating penguin corset of love, skimming vast continents of shifters and navels.
The seas shall never separate our trash can punchs.
Its waters wave like small earlobe angels greeting us from afar.
We shall feast on chocolate-coated garter belt and tender coupon hearts of love.
Adorned in white silk, we pluck our squishs from our black-eyed susans.
I shall hold your ukelele against my earlobe-muffin so that our trash can punchs melt into one.
You will always be my little pressie face, the ukelele of my lavender eye of love.

Feel free to go make your own. :)

Silly Stuff on a Thursday...

Billy sent these to me and I had to share...

If George W was a Jedi...

Scary thought, but funny!

What happens when Mentos and Diet Coke mix...

Wonder what it does to your system if you eat them together??

Life in the 1500s

I'm still working on cleaning out my inbox and here's one from my darling Thia. It definitely makes you grateful we live in this century!! :)

LIFE IN THE 1500s ...

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn't just how you like it, think about how things used to be. Here are some facts about the 1500s:

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and still smelled pretty good by June. However, they were starting to smell, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, Don't throw the baby out with the bath water.

Houses had…

When You Absolutely, Positively Have to Get Off the Phone...

Here's a site from Billy that made me laugh out loud. Check it out:

http://www.sorrygottago.com/

Aviation Humor

Still working on cleaning out the inbox and found this one from My Shelly. Hope it makes you guys smile! Happy Monday! :)

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Remember, it takes a college degree to fly a plane but only a high school diploma to fix one. This of course is great reassurance for those of us who fly routinely in their jobs.

After every flight, Qantas pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by Qantas' pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers. By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

For a Laugh...

Found this one from my hippie-momma today too. Hope it makes you giggle! :)

Tickle Me Elmo:

There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys.

The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.

Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 AM.

The next day at 8:45 AM there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door.

The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new employee.

He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule.

The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor.

When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're really beginning to pile up.

At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains of Tickle Me Elmo's.

She has a roll of plush red fabric and a huge bag of small …

The Thought For Today Is...

I was cleaning out my inbox and found this thought from my hippie-momma. Thought I'd share:

Today's thought is:

Nothing happens unless first a dream.
--Carl Sandburg

What do we see when we daydream about the future? Is everything much better than it is now, or are we still struggling with the same issues? Are we dreaming about what we really want or about what we think we want? Do we see the whole picture or just a piece of it? Do our daydreams match our goals?

Actions we take today affect how we live tomorrow. If we know what we want -- if we listen to our heart's desire, write down our goals, and keep them in mind with every action we take --we create our dreams. We turn our wishes into goals and our goals into reality.

Today I will visualize the life I want.

Like a Bank Account

Here's some really good advice from my mom-person today. Thought it was definitely worth sharing! :)

LIKE A BANK ACCOUNT

A 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud man, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o'clock, with his hair fashionably coiffed and shaved perfectly, even though he is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today. His wife of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary. After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, he smiled sweetly when told his room was ready.

As he maneuvered his walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of his tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on his window.

"I love it," he stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy.

"Mr. Jones, you haven't seen the room; just wait."

"That doesn't have anything to do with it," he replied. "Happiness is something you decide on ahead of …

Which Movie Badass Am I?

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Happily stolen from Kevin's myspace bulletin...glad the silly thing seems to be workin again! :)







Which B-Movie Badass Are You?




Fun at the Titty Twister.
Take this quiz!








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False Alarm...No Paycheck Coming :-(

I know enough about this industry to know that the deal is not done until the keys change hands. Since the keys changed hands over the weekend on the rental deal, I thought all was done and over. Unfortunately the people ended up having a "family emergency" and moved back to California instead, breaking the lease and taking away my paycheck. I didn't hear it from them, I heard it from the other agent on the deal. I can't get the clients to call me back. Wtf, Chuck???